Carburetor: a Limerick

"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee) 06/20/2015 at 10:00 • Filed to: None

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Why must you be so fickle?

Your gas flows in naught but a trickle

Your sound is sublime

But you don’t work all the time

And I’m left in a bit of a pickle.

ALTERN ATE VERSION:

There once was a man from Nantucket

Who looked at his carb and said “fuck it!”

The choke was all wrong

It wasn’t running so strong

So he said to himself “I’ll just chuck it”

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/20/2015 at 10:51

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This is wonderful.

(Not your problem but the writing)

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap 06/20/2015 at 10:56

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When the moons align, I am occasionally capable of stringing words together in a coherent and sometimes even pleasing manner. Only after I’ve had my coffee though.

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/20/2015 at 10:59

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Wait. Are there even people who can function before coffee? I can’t.

facw > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/08/2019 at 23:19

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You know, you used to get lot s  of people complaining about computer controlled fuel injection, and how it would make cars impossible to maintain, and yet it seems like carburetors are pretty much always fucked. But I guess it’s nice that a home mechanic can usually get them to the “it sort of works” state after a bunch of effort.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > facw 04/08/2019 at 23:22

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And then there’s the double whammy of computer controlled carbs

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/08/2019 at 23:23

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

Who hooked up the computer and said “FUCK IT.”

The differential voltage was wrong.

The CANbus was long.

So he said to himself ... nothing because he was attempting to commit suicide by alcohol poisoning.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap 04/08/2019 at 23:24

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They’d like you to believe that, but it’s not true.

They’re actually robots.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/08/2019 at 23:48

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ultrasonic cleaners are life altering

Future Heap Owner > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/08/2019 at 23:51

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... that’s a thing?

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 04/09/2019 at 00:11

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As someone who doesn't drink coffee I can confirm this fact.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Future Heap Owner 04/09/2019 at 00:13

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Ignorance absolutely is bliss in this case my friend.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/09/2019 at 00:15

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facw > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 04/09/2019 at 02:04

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Hmm, I don’t drink coffee, but I don’t think I’m a robot? I’d like to think a robotic body would be less defective?

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Future Heap Owner 04/09/2019 at 07:06

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They came about in the 80's as a stop-gap before automakers had TBI ready for production. They used temp sensors to and solenoids to automatically adjust the choke and  keep the air fuel ratio optimized. But, they barely worked properly out of the box and needed constant maintenance to run at all. Many a Jeep had their Carter BBDs ditched for basic all-mechanical carbs.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > facw 04/09/2019 at 07:18

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Your part of the first production run before they ironed out the bugs 

Future Heap Owner > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/09/2019 at 11:54

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Wow, that sounds like a nightmare. I didn’t know anyone put in computers before TBI. Thanks for explaining!